Mama Love

(thanks Julia for this post taken from her blog...)

The video below is Kirill. Last August. The day the Davis family met him for the first time. He was dirty and smelled of urine from his overloaded diaper. His hands were raw and bleeding from being constantly chewed and his ears had infected looking sores in them. He had on a shirt that was ragged and stained. He was tiny, cold and so very thin. He didn't talk but instead grunted and hissed. On the outside he was a wreck of a little guy. Covered with sores, frail, smelly and filthy dirty.

But to Tesney and Greg - He was gorgeous. He was beyond precious. They wanted nothing more than to grab him up, hold him close and run with him out of that orphanage as fast as their legs could carry them. He was their treasure. They delighted in every aspect of him. He was their son. Filthy - dirty - scab-encrusted - wretched. Their son. Handpicked by God to be theirs. They looked at him through the eyes of Love and deemed him perfect.

They were only able to see him for two days last August. Two hours total. In the first moments - when they first met him - they didn't want to frighten him - they wanted to give him space - room - time. So they gently talked - loved him from a distance - letting him make the first move - giving him the chance to choose.

This, my dear friends, is what Kirill chose.

He chose Mama Love.

He chose to be held close. He chose to have his head nestled in its proper place against his Mama's shoulder. He chose Love.

Last week a judge determined in a shocking ruling that this little boy would be better off in an institute instead of in a family.

She didn't see this video.

She didn't watch this little boy melt into his Mama's arms.

She didn't study the look of utter contentment on his face.

For two hours last August Kirill experienced for the only time in his life the wonder of being loved by a Mama.

He got to feel her gentle arms wrapped tightly around his dirty, sore-covered body and he got to hear her gentle voice whispering words of love in his infected little ears.

Mama Love.

A love that is beyond reason. A love that sees beauty in filth. A love that looks past the outward odor and appearance. A love that mirrors God's love.

Kirill is their son. Whether they are ever allowed to cross that ocean and bring him home or not - he is their son.

He needs His Mama.

The Davis blog is HERE.

And PRAY PRAY PRAY for the Hook family. Next Thursday - March 31 - they stand before the same judge - begging for their little girl. Please - Pray!

SOOO bummed!!!!

We thought for sure we would be submitted today (meaning our dossier would be submitted to the SDA, the State Department of Adoptions in Kareen's country, and the legal process would start and you would usually only be a few weeks from receiving a travel date) and we were NOT! OUr dossier got there so fast we thought for sure it would be submitted today, but since it was not it means we have to wait a WHOLE week to hear again! We are PRAYING that we get submitted next week because the first 2 weeks of April the SDA is closing to new dossiers so if we miss next weeks submission than we will be another few weeks out. Being submitted means more than just getting closer to a travel date....it means that your child's file is pulled and put in your file and that they are "legally held" for you and that they are alright. So continuing to wait to hear that good news is hard! I just need to KNOW that she is ours and that she is ok!

I emailed Kris and was very upset about not having good news today and in his usual wisdom he responded "Yeah that sucks, I was hoping to hear good news today. weird. I guess like everything in the process we just have to have faith that things will work out and that the timing of everything is in the Lord's hands, as it has been in everything that has happened so far. "

See why I married this man? On this rainy, gloomy, no good news day, he says the right thing to make me feel a little better.

What better way to celebrate world down syndrome day......

than to see an orphan who happens to have down syndrome, walk out of an orphanage in Russia and into her MOMMY's arms FOR GOOD!!!!!!!! It was GOTCHA DAY for Heather and Anya and the tears were flowing as I read about it!!!! Go HERE to read about it!

If you follow my family blog, than this is a repost, but if not, here is my post from today for world down syndrome day

"If you're lucky enough to be different, don't ever change."

-Taylor Swift-

With lots of girls in our house, we hear a lot of Taylor Swift and when I heard this quote of hers, I fell in love with it!

It is so fitting for today.

Today is March 21 or 3/21....it is World Down Syndrome Day because Down syndrome appears as 3 copies of the 21st chromosome. So today we are celebrating down syndrome.

Since blue is one of the colors for down syndrome awareness and the butterfly is also a symbol....this shirt of Bree's was a perfect choice for today.

Down syndrome has changed our lives. Little did we know in those first moments, hours , and days of this new world, that it would change our lives FOR. THE. BETTER.

Down syndrome is not WHO Bree is but rather something that she has, but because of her extra chromosome, we have had so many opportunities and so many experiences that we never would have had without the down syndrome. We have many friends we would never had met, we have had many opportunities we would never have had, and now we will soon have another daughter who we never would have found had it not been for down syndrome.

I went in Bree's room the other night to kiss her goodnight and as I sat there looking at her sweet face, I got emotional thinking that she is Kareen's guardian angel.

SHE is the reason we were led to Kareen.

SHE is the reason we knew we could say yes to Kareen.

I can only imagine the conversations that must have gone on in heaven between Bree and Kareen as they looked forward to their lives on earth. Bree must have told Kareen that they would go down to earth around the same time but they would not find eachother for 4 years, until mom and dad were ready. Bree must have told Kareen that she would feel lost for a time but that one day all that would change. I am sure Bree promised Kareen that if she would just hold on, that we would come for her and that they would both have a family together.

THEY are both the reason we want others to know that down syndrome is not scary, in fact it is down right wonderful (no pun intended there)!

So on this world down syndrome day we celebrate this extra part of our lives.

We celebrate the joy and happiness that down syndrome has brought us.

We celebrate the friends we have through this down syndrome family.

We celebrate that on the other side of the world we have another daughter who also has down syndrome.

We celebrate the hope that one day the world will not deem children unworthy because of down syndrome.

HAPPY WORLD DOWN SYNDROME DAY!

Leap of Faith

When we jumped into this journey, we took a leap of faith, a BIG one.

We did not know anything about adoption, let alone international adoption.

We did not know how we were going to come up with the money needed.

We did not know how we were going to get all the paperwork done this time of year.With Kris working such insane hours (tax season) it left me to do most of the legwork and paperwork, which was scary to me because Kris is the one that is good at all of that, he is an accountant after all.I can barely keep my head afloat this time of year without the added tasks required for an international adoption.

But we lept with faith anyway...

We do not know much about Kareen.

We do not know what foods she likes, or what she likes to do.

We do not know what her smile looks like.

We do not know if she will be small for her age, or if she walks well, or how well she speaks.

We do not know if she will have health problems.

We do not know if she looks the same as this picture that we now have engrained in our heads.

We do not know the circumstances of her birth family.

We do not know if she is like Bree in her development or interests.

We know very little about her.

But we lept with faith anyway....

At this point in the process the leap of faith is not over. As we hear of all the unknowns and the unexpected things that could come up, it sometimes gets scary. But we will continue to have faith and hold on to the things we DO know!

We DO know she is 4 years old.

We DO know she has brown hair.

We know these few sentences from her bio on Reeces Rainbow

"This pretty muffin is waiting for her family! She is healthy, with no heart condition noted in her records. She has brown hair and hazel eyes, and is already up and learning to walk! Her records indicate "meiotic nondisjunction", but this is just a fancy word for what happens to create "Down syndrome" genetically. She is considered higher functioning and is really doing well. She is an orphanage favorite, and the dircetor has asked for a family to save her from the institution."

We DO know she was given up at birth because she was born with down syndrome.

We DO know she would be transferred to an institution soon if we don't save her.

We DO know she has much more to offer than her little bio and profile picture.

We DO know that she is worthy of love and that she will blossom and grow.

We DO know that she and Bree will have eachother....always.

Like these two sisters....

(one born into their family by birth, one by adoption to Lisa's family)

or these two sisters.......

( one born into the family through birth, one through adoption to Bethany's family)

We DO know that she is worth the risk and the unknowns of this journey, because Bree has shown us what a child with DS has to offer.

We DO know that she will be loved......by many.....when she comes home.

We DO know that her sisters adore her already and fervently pray for her.

We DO know that we love her and that she is meant to be part of our family.

Once again, I am pulling from the wise words of Lisa, "Having a child is always a leap of faith. We never really know what the future holds for any of our children, whether they are our biological children or adopted children. We can't plan for future diagnoses, illnesses, accidents, surgeries, and so on. We also can't plan for the untold joys and rewards of knowing, loving or raising any child.Granted, there are some things we can do to reduce our risk of heartache, but the reality is that we either live in constant fear and uncertainty of the unknown and unwanted, or we can choose to live in peace, understanding that there is good in every person and every circumstance--even when we might not first see it there."

When I was emailing back and forth with Lisa during our soul searching and trying to decide if this path was really what our family should be doing, Lisa often gave me strength and comfort. She said,"Not getting her might be easier, but she will be worth the effort :). Good things are in store for you! I am so glad you are both willing to take a leap of faith and can't wait to see how your story unfolds....You know what it is like when you see a new mother of a baby with Down syndrome...how you want to tell her it will all be okay...that her baby will be just as important and wonderful as everyone else in the family? That her life is really just beginning.....I would say the same things to you. There are never any guarantees....but I have a strong feeling that adopting Kareen would be one of the best decisions of your life. "

In the few short months we have been on this journey, we have grown and been touched and stretched in ways we could never have imagined and we KNOW this is what we are supposed to be doing, even with all the unknowns and the what ifs. We must go forward with faith, because a little girls life.....OUR little girls life....is at stake!

The good and the Bad

The good......

Anna has a family again!!!!!!

A family who is leaving next week to go to the same orphanage to meet their son Sasha

is now adding Anna to their family and bringing her home as well!!!! AMAZING!!!!

The bad.......

Another family went before a judge in EE and the courts ruled that their child was unadoptable because he has down syndrome....and said he would be better off in an institution. This poor family now has to go home without him

and this poor little boy is wondering what happened to his mom and dad.

MANY prayers go to this family in this heartbreaking trial and many prayers that there will be a miracle and the process can be appealed and the hearts of those officials in this region can be softened. There are a few other families heading to the same region in the next few weeks to adopt and they will face this same situation if hearts are not softened.

Anna

This is Anna

Anna's Reeces Rainbow page says this:

Girl, Born January 4, 2008

Anna has dark hair and dark eyes. She is so pretty! She was born with a minor heart murmur, and should be seen by a cardiologist once home.

From one of our adopting families who visited with her in April 2010: "I met Anna's mother today….a beautiful young woman….she LOVES Anna and visits her often…brings diapers and soap…takes her for walks, kisses her, and picks flowers for her. They are BEAUTIFUL together. It breaks my heart. She wants her child but can't care for her. We need to find Anna a home so this mother can know her daughter will be ok…she would probably love to stay in contact too…oh how complicated she must feel. Anna is ADORABLE!"

$5896.00 is available towards the cost of my adoption!

Anna did have a family coming for her and as of today she doesn't anymore. Her adoption fell through. For one reason or another her family is not able to follow through and bring her home. I do not know details but it is all just heartbreaking.

I first saw Anna on Jennifer's blog. Jennifer adopted Sophia last year from Anna's orphanage and was able to meet Anna. Anna's story has always stuck with me because it is so unique.

This is Anna and her mom (taken last year sometime at the orphanage while Jennifer was visiting Sophia)

This is Anna's story (taken from Jennifer's blog)

"

On the second visit we saw this mom that comes to visit her daughter on Sundays. It is the most heartbreaking thing to see, she loves her daughter so much but can't take her home because she won't have a future in this country. She visits every Sunday and bring her daughter Anna diapers and other necessities, treats for the children and the staff. She spends several hours with Anna taking her on walks, picking flowers for her, talking to her and loving her. We don't know the complete story but we know from Marina (our facilitator) that she wants her baby to be adopted so that her daughter can have a better life than she would here. She is currently on Reece's Rainbow as waiting for a family. Jen and I can't image what it must be like to have to make the most difficult decision of giving your child for adoption when you love them so dearly. But at this date and time in her country, she has no other option."

From what I have heard, not only would Anna not have a future in her country, but her mom would be shunned. She could lose her house, her job, her family, all because she had a child with down syndrome. So she did what she thought was best for her daughter and she gave her up. Now she waits....again....for a family to rescue her child and give her the future that she can only dream of giving her.

Tracking it

I am obsessed with tracking the dossier on its journey to Eastern Europe. At 3:13 am March 16, 2011 it has currently departed Paris France!!!